Last day at the MTC. P A R T Y!
I am so ready to get out in the field. I already love the people in Kansas. I will miss parts of the MTC those parts being: my district, teachers, TRC, temple walks, and that is pretty much it. I will NOT miss the food.
This week was so hard. We had investigator named Katie. She is a strong christian and loves God and Jesus Christ and is easy to talk too. But once Sister Brady and I started talking about religion she would completely shut off. All three lessons were hard with her. She knew the doctrine but did not feel the Spirit. No conversion can happen without the Spirit. I know that to be true. The last lesson we were really focusing on baptism and she said, “I will be baptized if God tells me I need to be.” As Sister Brady was sharing her testimony the Spirit told me to promise Katie that if she prayed right then and there with a true desire to know if this church was true she would receive an answer. I did exactly that and Katie looked at me and said, “Well don’t be disappointed if I don’t get answer.” We knelt down to pray and she asked and then ended the pray looked at me and said, ” I felt nothing.” I couldn’t believe it. I was crushed and so frustrated. I couldn’t even talk. I let Sister Brady finish the lesson and walked out of there with tears in my eyes not understanding.
Why would the Spirit tell me to do something like that if it didn’t work. I looked like a complete idiot in there. After talking with my teacher and praying and crying I realized that if there desire is not true the Spirit will not manifest the truth of all things unto you. I love Katie and am so grateful for the opportunity to teach and love her. Our other investigator Ashlee was awesome but also struggled with feeling the Spirit. She felt something special when we taught her the Plan of salvation and we got her to recognize that she was feeling the Spirit. At our last lesson with her, the Spirit was so strong and she committed to baptism and was passed on to other missionaries that will work with her.
The MTC is amazing but so incredibly hard. If you are going on a mission just know that this is supposed to be hard. This is in no way supposed to be easy. As missionaries you are set apart by special authority to teach with the converting power of the Spirit. Heavenly Father wouldn’t send out 18 and 19 year old men and women if He didn’t think we can do this. The only way we can do this is through our Savior Jesus Christ. Pray often, read and study the scriptures everyday. If you are not on a mission I invite you to pray often, read and study your scriptures everyday.
I ask myself this question everyday before I go to bed, ” If this is so hard, why am I still here? I am still here because I love the Lord and know this is His work.” I love my Savior and my Father in Heaven. I know the Book of Mormon to be the word of God, no conversion can happen without the Spirit, and I love all of you. I know this Gospel to be true. I invite all of you to get on your knees and ask your Father in Heaven if this Gospel to be true. I know that if you ask with a sincere heart and real intent. The Spirit will manifest the truth unto you. God is the Father of our spirits. Adam is the father of our mortality. Jesus is the father of our immortality. and our Dads are the fathers of our bodies.” I love you and I am off to Kansas at 2:30AM tomorrow morning. I am so pumped for tornados and all that jazz.